On our delayed flight from Toronto, to Punta Cana, we experienced a couple of hiccups. Major hiccups. Okay, scary-ass turbulence to be exact!
I know that all of us who have traveled, this is a common thing. We expect this once in a while, but when it does happen, you hope for it to be not so bad.
Well, our turbulence made women scream and grown-ass men, groan. Like a deep scared out of their wits-didn’t-mean-to-let-my-emotions-out groan.
The turbulence was so scary I had to zone out completely. This is not an easy task for a person who suffers from anxiety.
As the airplane bobbled up and then down suddenly,(this happened 3xs) I put on my ear pods and my ears exploded with Bruno Mars – “Versace on the floor”. I thought that would calm me down, but it didn’t.
So I changed the music to my favorite Maroon 5 – “Memories” Um, nope, not a good idea.
I turned it off and concentrated on my prayers. Over and over again, I said the Latin prayer my mom made me memorize.
It finally calmed me down.
I looked across from me, at my husband, who was already staring at me.
We were both sitting on aisle seats, so I couldn’t touch him unless I pried the grip of life from my armrest. I didn’t.
I sat there and closed my eyes. Horrified and wished that the pilot loved his life, the way we all did.
I said to myself as I listened to everyone panic, that at the end of this horror movie, I would compile a little list.
So I made this list of “What to do and NOT do, during Turbulence:
- Do not freak me the hell out with your screaming, Jesus Christ!
- Do not scream “oh my God’ a million times so I can hear you. Please keep that to yourself.
- Do not whisper to yourself “we are going to die” because I friggin can still hear you!
- Do not whimper quietly to yourself, guess what? I can still hear you!
- Do say the Lord’s prayer silently in your head over and over and over again. (that’s what I did)
- Do recite the Latin prayer that your mother taught you even though you have no idea what it means. (sorry if your mom didn’t teach you the Latin prayer)
- Don’t think negative thoughts.
- Do fill your mind with happy happy happy ass thoughts!
- Do promise yourself that if this goes away, you’ll tolerate your hubby being crabby.
- Do break that promise as soon as you land. LOL
When we landed I swear to God, everyone was cheering. Like actually cheering a relief-of-life- cheering.
I was thinking oh Lord, we have to be back on the plane in 8 days. Help me… (silently crying inside myself)
There you go folks, just thought I’d give you the best advice possible.
ps. If you have any advice to add to my list, please drop me a comment!